Tag: depression

Stroke stories are meant to be shared

Shelagh

Do you share your own stroke story? Sharing my own stroke story is something I never envisaged during my initial stroke recovery. Why? That’s because I was not in a positive, happy place but now, I see the importance of making something good out of my bad health experience and THE best way to move forward is with passion and positivity. I began by writing my stroke poetry, as my brain would only work in rhyme, and sharing this poetry on the many Facebook support stroke groups, such as Return to work after stroke, really helped me understand how others suffered and the fact I was not alone. This was very cathartic for me, as it emptied my head of the frustrations, sadness and often amusing times that are all part of stroke recovery. Many readers would thank me for my poetry and also comment that they were unable to put their own emotions into words. Here’s one of my many poems that can be found in my book A Stroke of Poetry and was taken from my own experience of mild aphasia and know that many stroke survivors suffer from Aphasia (A language disorder that affects a person’s ability to communicate).

I UNDERSTAND

Please don’t talk to me in baby talk. It really isn’t good.

Even though my words don’t come out right, I can hear; I understood

Don’t finish all my sentences. When you talk to me this way,

as it’s clear you wish I’d hurry up so we can get on with the day.

Even though my words are jumbled, and I slur to get them out,

Inside I know what I want to say so give me time and please don’t shout.

It’s important for me to process what I think I want to tell.

Even though when the words are spoken, they may not come out too well.

Buckets of patience I know you’ll need to help me through this time.

But please, oh please be mindful, they are not your words but mine.

I know my brain will heal but you must give me space.

Having a conversation does not need to be a race.

Sometimes I may not want to join in as my what anyone has to say.

But that’s okay, I do not mind, as my brain needs a rest today.

During my career as a 25 year UK Police Officer, and the latter 5 years being a Detective Inspector, I found myself stood in front of groups of officers delivering either training or simply briefing search teams in regard to serious crime matters. WOW, how my life has changed! What I am trying to say, is that the bags of confidence I had during my Police career were lost after my stroke, and even though it took a while to return, my confidence is back! Different job, but I now love standing in front of audiences; whether that be ten women from the local slimming group whilst I deliver the Stroke Foundation Stroke safe programme, or as a Motivational Speaker, sharing my story to 150+ delegates at a health conference. It is all the same. It is me, Shelagh Brennand, Stroke Survivor, Stroke Safe Ambassador and author of A Stroke of Poetry; simply sharing my stroke story. Here’s a great photo of a ‘Conversations on the Deck’ event at a local cafe; sharing stroke awareness and my stroke story with interested locals.29.3.19_Conversations on the Deck_reading poetry and raising money for Sevgen

Sharing your own stroke story does not always have to be verbal and in front of a huge crowd, as there are many opportunities to write articles, or other writers sharing your story in magazines, newspapers and other publications. I found a great resource in the website Sourcebottle.com.au; where they connect expert sources with journalists and bloggers. Once registered, I would answer many ‘shout outs’ from journalists who wanted a positive story about becoming healthier, and moving on with my life after illness. I have also recorded a number of podcasts over the years and one recorded last year with the The Phoenix Phenomen is a way of sharing my story to the world. One of my latest media articles is a feature in the July 2019 edition of That’s Life Magazine, which is distributed throughout Australia and New Zealand. There are plenty more like this on the media page of my website so have a read, and you can see the variety of ways I have shared my story over the last few years. This may give you some ideas of how you can share your story.

I often use the words ‘You have to be in it to win it’ and although putting yourself forward for things can be daunting; they can also be very much worthwhile. Last year, I won a competition to have a short documentary film about my life. It was only released last week and the amazing film company Inspireflix love to film and share inspiring stories. My film is 8.5 minutes long and I feel that it  captures my life and the story I want to tell the world. The importance of sharing my stroke story is to tell others:

  • STAY POSITIVE
  • NEVER GIVE UP
  • ALWAYS SEEK SUPPORT

Please get in touch if I can help or direct you into sharing your own stroke story and until next time, take care and stay stroke safe.

Shelagh

Losing your identity after stroke

Shelagh

Welcome back to my blog and even though it has been some time since I last wrote, I plan to be blogging more frequently, and I very much hope you enjoy what I have to say; so please feel free to share with others who may benefit from my words and perhaps leave me a comment as to what you would like to read.

In this blog, I would love to talk about the issue of losing your identity after stroke and specifically, the emotional side of stroke recovery. I was stirred to write this blog after receiving and reading a wonderful, insightful book about stroke identity (but I will come to that soon). Like many, I felt in the early days that my brain had been taken and replaced with one I did not want or even liked very much. I lost ‘me’ and so many parts of ‘me’ that I resented the person I was. My brain was slow and I had difficulty forming words and sentences. Bring on the depression and this made a great recipe for not being able to move forward with any form of positivity or focus. Does this resonate with my stroke survivor friends out there?

 

My brain worked in rhyme shortly after my stroke and this helped me enormously to deal with the emotions I was feeling;  such as the frustrations, forgetfulness and often sad times I was going through. For those who have read some of my poetry from my book A Stroke of Poetry, one poem entitled: Who stole my brain? is a perfect example of some of the emotions I felt following my stroke and I know these feelings are experienced by many stroke survivors all over the world. Who Stole my Brain poem.jpg 2

Perhaps this poem explains the seriousness of losing ‘me’ but a light-hearted touch upon the fact it is actually still OK to feel like this. As a Stroke Safe Ambassador, Motivational Speaker and passionate stroke advocate, I still campaign to have the voices heard of those who are struggling emotionally – what I refer to as one of the many invisible disabilities of stroke.

Now about this amazing book I mentioned and think we need a short drum role for the truly amazing Debra Meyerson and her recently published book Identity Theft – Rediscovering Ourselves After Stroke. I first connected with Debra, a former Stanford Professor, on Twitter some years ago, following her own severe stroke, as she was keen to conduct research with other stroke survivors. Many examples of those she has interviewed are featured in her book. Some, sadly, have not been able to accept their life changing stroke and thereby unable to move forward positively, but there are other examples of hope, inspiration and those who feel their stroke was meant to happen.Book cover - Identity Theft

Debras story and her own stroke recovery is inspirational and this book was written to help others cope with the emotional part of any stroke recovery. It follows her severe stroke that left her physically incapacitated and unable to speak and covers in detail, the emotional journey of her recovery, including the fabulous, selfless support provided by her husband and children.

I had many tears reading this book as although I am lucky to have been left with no physical disability, my early stroke recovery identified so much with Debras words, emotions and ‘day to day’ feeling of being lost in a person you once were and is the first book where I truly felt connected to what I suffered. Debra was kind enough to send me additional books so if you feel this is something you would like to read, drop me a message and let’s share the love and inspiration from the amazing Debra E. Myerson PhD.

Thanks for reading and always be ‘stroke safe’Signed copy Identity Theft

Shelagh